Total Suckage

Okay...so while I'm on this little journey, I decided to join a weight loss competition at work.

Basically, everyone kicks in $20 and, at the end of ten weeks, the person who's lost the most inches and the person who's lost the bigget percentage of weight split the money. There's motivational meetings (on which I usually pass) and weekly weigh-ins. Your weight is measured in tenths and rounded up to the next pound. If you gain weight, you have to pitch in a buck per pound, with a $5 maximum.

So, this week TOTALLY sucked! Two of my good friends and I are in this together -- we weigh in together, we support each other, and we cheer for each other. Neither of them has started a workout program and only one of them seems to be watching what she eats. So, why the total suckage for this week? One friend stayed stable (no gain and no loss), one friend lost three pounds (go her!), and as for me? Well, as for me, I GAINED a freaking pound! A pound! Dammit! I gained a pound!

I'm losing inches, but we don't measure those each week -- just once to start, then again at week five, and one last time on the final day. So, it looks like I'm a total slob who's accomplishing nothing.

It's so insanely frustrating. And, yes, I'm the ONLY person in the ENTIRE competition who gained any weight! How humiliating! Several people have told me that it's probably muscle and I have to hope that they're right. It honestly could even been water or heavier clothes or something else small. It's still annoying.

To my credit, my weight last week was XX9.7, and my weight this week was XX0.1. So, truthfully, I gained, at max, four tenths of a pound, but with rounding, I'm still recorded as having gained. Ugh.

But I'm not quitting. Nope. Not me. In fact, I really didn't want to work out tonight -- worse than ever yet in this whole process -- but I forced myself to...and it was the best workout I've had to date. I feel great and know that I'll start dropping pounds soon. I have to...right?

If You Can't Say Anything Nice...

Losing weight is one of the hardest things that a person can do (at least in my humble opinion). It takes dedication, willpower, determination, and support...lots of support from people who love the person involved in the weight loss plan. The last thing that I need on this weight loss journey, other than a donut, is someone who's not supportive or is negative.

Do I believe that every single person in my life needs to cheer me on and offer me support? Absolutely not! But I deeply appreciate those who do -- probably more than they'll ever know. From my friends at work who are holding me accountable and accompanying to weekly weigh-ins (Did I mention I'm involved in a weight loss challenge at work?), to my awesome boyfriend who has faith in me, I couldn't do this without them.

So, what is it that's so annoying to me right now? The negative people. The non-supportive ones who openly discuss their non-support. Those individuals who don't believe in me and say so. The person who took me to task for snacking on a small batch of popcorn today because she believed it wasn't healthy enough.

Who in the hell are they to decide what I can and cannot do? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe that I'm ME and I'M the only one who truly can or cannot determine what is possible in my life.

To all of those negative jerks who are out there...well, I'd like to say something rude, but I'm taking the high road...at least for now. My mama taught me that I shouldn't say anything at all, if I can't say anything nice, so I'll just choose to shut my mouth and ignore you. My justice will be proving you wrong and dropping all of these pounds. And, for the record, I'm off to a good start and am SO looking forward to making you eat your words.